Okay, this is MEANT to be a shorty, in my mind. We'll see how it actually plays out.
So, I feel as though I have often been criticised (perhaps not vocally, and perhaps it is mostly myself that is to blame) for being less visual about my faith, or not as emotively engaged in worship.
Admittedly, I'm not that comfortable with overt signs of outward emotion in this regard, and I can't pin down exactly why that is. It comes out in my relationships - most people who know me can probably tell you that I tend not to react to things a lot of the time, whether they be negative or positive things. If a close friend tells me about something great they have accomplished, I am not the person who is going to jump up and down and scream with excitement, though I am likely doing so inside for them. The same could be said about tragedy - if somebody close to me were to die, I probably wouldn't cry or be outwardly distressed about it, whatever I feel on the inside. Again, not sure why - I think part of it may be the result of me having been damaged at some point in my life.
What I am learning though, is that a lot of this simply is because this is the way that I am. I do things and process things differently than a lot of people - I prefer quiet, inward (and usually slow) contemplation over outward manifestations of joy. I derive greater satisfaction from really chewing something over and appreciating it in my mind than I do in blowing off steam. If this sometimes gives off the impression that I am being disingenuous, well that bothers me, because I'm really not!
As I started off saying, this translates largely into my spiritual life - I'm not the throwing-my-hands-up-in-the-air-halleluiah! kind of person. I've tried, and it doesn't feel natural - it just isn't me. I don't particularly like getting in front of a group of people and spiritualizing, or blubbing or falling over or whatever it is that people apparently are supposed to do when they are being "spiritual".
Me, I think about things a lot. I have often wondered if something was wrong with me (as, I am aware, have others), however it brings me great pleasure and contentment to read these words of Jesus and know that he knew where I am coming from.
"And now, about prayer. When you pray, don't be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them. I assure you, that is all the reward they will ever get. But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father secretly. Then your Father, who knows all secrets, will reward you.
"When you pray, don't babble on and on as people of other religions do. They think their prayers are answered only by repeating their words again and again. Don't be like them, because your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!" Matt 6:5-8
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6 comments:
There is balance to those verses though...
What about those that are naturally charismatic in personality,
are they religious?
do they press your buttons?
do they irritate you?
Our personalities are only a vehicle for the expression of the Holy Spirit, and if we limit or hinder that expression we lose out on the fullness of Gods manifest presense in our lives.
Sometimes the most charismatic person in the room is the reflection of the content and intent of our heart, and that reveals the lack of freedom we really have...
These are very good points, and questions that I have been asking myself for quite a long time. I thinkI was more getting at the fact that there is a place for my style of worshipping - that Jesus very specifically endorses it, in fact, which flies in the face of how a lot Christians seem to expect believers to be.
I have to say also that in my experience there are a lot of fakers, plain and simple. There are a lot of people who seem to act charismatic and spiritual because the expectation is there for them to do so. I have trouble when I see people who seem to act so "tuned-in" to the movement of the spirit when people's eyes are on them, but behind closed doors they do everything they can to impose their own personal limitations on what is acceptable, or push push push for their own agendas in the church. (It goes back to my previous post about Pillars in the Church).
But you're right, there are people who are just genuinely "out there" with God, not because they are putting on act or necessary deciding to act in any specific way, but just because that is how they are.
Praise God, we're all different. Can you imagine being in a community where looks like people have been cut with a cookie cutter, everybody identical,same ingredients inside and out. Somehow that falls so short of God's creation.
I heard a very thought provoking message in church a couple weeks back. The gist of it was that since our various giftings make us very different from each other (but one in Christ) - the tendancy can be to look to our carnal inner man and in turn we'll get more irritated and frustrated with each other - and thus division can occur. But... if we walk in the measure of Grace the Father has given us.. we can walk together despite the variation in our giftings - and learn to have grace for one another.
True.. there are fakers out there - and there always will be. I think ultimately it comes down to knowing who you are in Christ, and your relationship in Him.
From that stance.. every act of worship.. where inward or outward, can truly be a geniune expression of our love to Him.
Great thoughts Ry!
Ryan there is a place for your kind of worship. We were not all created the same and we reflect God's character in many ways. You don't have to raise your arms and dance around to praise God, and I appreciate that you allow me the freedom and encourage me to express myself in worship the way I feel led to.
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